UPDATE: Okay, so at the point of writing this, I was kinda pissed so my judgment might have been biased. To be fair, the said person is, in fact, pretty nice at nice times.
"One who gets the job done by doing it is called a worker. He does all the hard labour but is never recognized for it. One who gets the job done by delegating the work to others is called a manager. He does no work but is recognized for being able to manage the work well, and hence gets promoted"
-One of my colleagues-
It's been a long time since I've updated. As usual, coz there's nothing much to blog about; how would you expect one to have a life when all she does is:
7 a.m. : Wake up, go to work.
6 p.m. : (note that it's been 12 hours of my precious life gone, and my
real life for the day hasn't even begun) Arrive home, dinner, shower.
7 p.m. : (my life starts here) Check mail, Facebook.
7.30 p.m. : can only do one of the following coz not enough time for all -
oh, how sad my life is: computer gaming OR watch TV series OR watch a movie
11 p.m. : get ready for bed, procrastinate going to bed.
Approx. 11.30 p.m. / 12 a.m. : Finally get to bed.
And this is just my internship. I'm dreading real working life.
Have finally got stuff to update today.
Has been happening for past few weeks already; been getting on my nerves, but today is the last straw and as nice a person as I am, it is OVER. MY. LIMIT.
I know I rarely get angry, but when I do...
Having great talent in speaking politely with hidden stabs is just one of the few things I pride myself of.
It's advantageous coz then people can't hold it against you for being rude or uncivilized or unreasonable (well, I WAS polite and I was JUST speaking my opinion, and I HAVE reasonable basis for my arguments) - think politically correct - but on the other hand, they'll get the message that I'm pissed and hopefully realise that as petite as I may seem, I AM capable of retaliation.
So. It all started when there was this guy, let's call him Mr Z, contacts me a couple weeks into the start of my internship. Incidentally, I had begun my internship at such a strategic time, a critical time when Mr Z needed some stuff coz the deadline was just on the time when I started working.
Me, being new and all, of coruse was still very blur about my job around here, and of course took my time to learn about what to do. Mr Z, on the other hand, was getting pissed coz I was not responding to his e-mails. What he didn't know was that, I HAD NO ACCESS to my e-mail yet because I was new and the process would take a while before the database could
So then, he kept sending me e-mails, and I kept not replying him. In the end, he got fed up and called me. Well, I answered and being new and all, I was still feeling scared and tried my best to be nice to everyone. (Not that I'm not nice to everyone now, I still am, but braver now =)) So then, he sort of "lectured". "Lecture" as in, you know the times when you were young and your parents lectured you on something wrong that you did, and
you found that you could not answer back, so you just shut up, listened, and patiently waited for the lecture to end? Yeah, that's what he did to me. Treated me like a child and shit like that.
Lectured on why he needed it so urgently, and on why I have not done it yet, and that I will NEED TO DO IT ASAP. Like, hello, who the heck are you to lecture me on my first week of work? Of course, at that moment, I didn't think that, I just assumed he was in a position to do so. As you can expect, it wasn't his concern whether I was blur about the job or not, by hook or by crook, he wanted it done.
So anyway I ran to my supervisor about it, and - God bless him - he was very kind about it and helped me talk to Mr Z. Eventually, seeing that I was still new and all, my supervisor also (very kindly) helped me get the job done.
So well, the first impression I had on Mr Z wasn't all that good.
A month later, Mr Z contacted me again, telling me there was a mini "project" that needs to be done. The previous intern had been working on it, and I was to continue his work. He arranged for us to meet, and when I met him, my image of him totally changed. He was very friendly and smiled pretty often, and he was even nice to me. Not rude or angry, like the last
time when we talked on the phone. So well, I naively assumed that maybe he was just having a bad day the last time (do I hear PMS?) and that in fact, he may be a nice enough guy to work with.
He then explained to me about the "project", and told me there was a process I would need to learn before embarking on this. He knew the process as well, don't ask me why he did not personally teach me about it but instead told me to learn it from other people.
So anyway, I went along and learnt it, though not very well, coz I wasn't allowed access to it, so I couldn't have hands-on, but only listen and learn from explanations by others. At least I had a rough idea about it.
Then I came back to Mr Z, and told him I had learnt about it. He asked me several questions, to some I could not answer very well, and to which he concluded that I did not learn it well enough and told me to learn it again. ZzZZzzz.
So I learned it again, and came back to Mr Z. I think it's essential that I point out here that I DID learn the process very well, and I asked lots of questions and at the end of the lesson I even asked is there anything else I need to know?" and made sure I knew everything. Would it be really my fault then, if Mr Z asked me something that I was not even taught? I
already tried to learn everything and asked all questions I could ask, is it really my fault if there was some question left unasked, because of the mere fact that I myself DID NOT EVEN KNOW THAT QUESTION/PROBLEM EXISTED?
I learned the process THREE FRICKIN' TIMES and even after that Mr Z insisted that I didn't know enough. Well, how can I, when I MYSELF AM NOT ALLOWED ACCESS TO THE SYSTEM, HENCE I CANNOT HAVE HANDS ON, AND HENCE AM MERELY LEARNING BY LOOKING?
If Mr Z was such a pro about it, WHY WON'T HE TEACH ME? WHY TELL ME TO
LEARN IT FROM OTHERS INSTEAD, BUT WHEN I TELL HIM I HAVE FINISHED LEARNING IT, HE INSISTS THAT I HAVE NOT LEARNED ENOUGH?
If you think I have not learned the things you expect me to know, THEN YOU TEACH ME YOURSELF LAH, ASSHOLE.
So anyway, I had also discussed this "project" with my supervisor, and my supervisor had already approved of my work and was very satisfied with what I have done. But IDIOTIC MR Z KEEP FINDING MY FAULTS.
WELL, WHO THE FUCK ARE YOU TO TELL ME WHAT I'M DOING IS WRONG, WHEN YOU ARE NOT EVEN FROM MY DEPARTMENT, AND WHEN MY OWN SUPERVISOR HAS ALREADY APPROVED MY WORK?
There was even once when he scolded me through the phone and I still had to act happy and polite and all, but when we finally hung up, I ALMOST CRIED. Scratch that, actually there were tears already, but then I had the flu so nobody noticed when I took a tissue to my face.
So then most recently, I discussed about the "project" with my supervisor, and my supervisor corrected some of my mistakes. I discussed it with Mr Z, and Mr Z agreed about what my supervisor said, and even gave me further instructions to do according to what my supervisor told me to do.
So I went and did it, and then I forwareded the final result to Mr Z and my supervisor. Because of the time Mr Z scolded me (for something that was utterly not my fault, FYI) till I was on the verge of tears, I was still kinda fuming so this is what I said:
(if you can't read the fine print, click on the image to enlarge)
And then, do you know what that asshole Mr Z replied?
Here's what he said:
Like WHAT THE FUCK??
I find so many things wrong with this email.
Firstly, I DID THIS BECAUSE IT WAS WHAT MY SUPERVISOR ASKED ME TO DO, AND WE HAD ALSO DISCUSSED ABOUT THIS, AND YOU AGREED FOR ME TO DO THIS. NOW I DID IT AND YOU ASK ME WHY??????
Secondly, EXPLAIN WHAT SHIT? Have you EVER explained anything to me? You have been making me run from this guy to that guy, forcing me to learn everything by myself. But YOU? YOU DID NOT EXPLAINED NO SHIT TO ME.
Thirdly, do I give a fuck whether you are disappointed in me or not? If you didn't know, MY SUPERVISOR AND BOSS ARE VERY HAPPY WITH MY PERFORMANCE. I don't give a shit if YOU are disappointed in me, you don't mean shit to my working life. Just because I am a student and not a permanent employee of the company does not mean you get to kick me around like I'm your student. If anything, it is MY SUPERVISOR who has the right to ill-treat me, not some nobody like you.
So anyway, I was procrastinating about calling him when my supervisor called me over and said that he would personally explain the situation to him. Which at that point, I heaved a huge sigh of relief, coz who knows what shit Mr Z will say to my face again if I called him?
Here's how my supervisor saved the day:
You may tell me that I should tell my supervisor about Mr Z, so that at least my supervisor could save me, but I can't coz if I do, both my supervisor and Mr Z would view me as some weakling who can't even stand on her own shoes and needs her supervisor to back her up.
Which is definitely not the impression I want others to have of me.
So anyways. That's about it. The problem isn't completely solved yet, but I'm praying it will soon enough.
I'll update again if there's more news about him.
But oh, well. What does it matter. My internship only lasts 6 months, anyway. Besides, at least I now have a taste of what the real working life might me.
It's gonna be a bleak road down my career.