To all my beloved friends, ...

"Friendship is unnecessary; like philosophy, like art... It has no survival value; rather is one of those things that give value to survival."

- C. S. Lewis

Sorry if I have seldom contacted you, sorry if I have never messaged you at random times, sorry if I have never sent you messages on MSN, sorry if I didn't even bother to drop you a single "Hi" on Facebook.

Call me 'boh cheng', call me ungrateful; maybe that's what I am.

The thing is, I'm not the kind of person who thinks to message her friends for no apparent reason, or to forwards 'friendship e-mails' or anything of that sort.

Maybe I'm kinda scared of conversations getting weird we're talking we run out of topics to say, and it sorta ends up being awfully awkward.

Or maybe, I'm just too busy with everyday-stuff. You know how instant messaging which you thought would only last for 10 minutes eventually turn out to be a 2-hour conversation and you end up with undone tutorials piling up your desk.

Do remember though, that I do think of you at random times, back when we were still pretty "innocent" (well, I can't exactly say we were; how innocent can you expect 16/17-year-olds to be?) - at least innocent enough to think that we had experienced the greatest friendships we would ever have in our lives - and I can't deny that.

Sure, we'd make new friends, lead new lives, explore the world - but we naively thought we'd stay friends *ahem* forever.

I digress.

In reality, it is sometimes rather hard to keep in touch with all your old friends - especially when you've discovered new ones along with a whole new life ahead of you - but that doesn't mean it should keep me from thinking of the good old times.

Maybe I'm not much of a "friendship" person, but I do know what friendship is, and what it's like to want to keep a friendship going forever.

Okay, this is getting more emo than I expected.

That being said, I know there are times when you may be mad at me for not contacting you like I promised I would 4 years ago; but do keep in mind that I do think of you. I do miss you, and I do want to meet up with you whenever we can. Catching up on each others' lives, talking about our past, just reminiscing.

To those that I've less contacted (or not at all), I'm sorry if our friendship has not worked out as we had hoped. People change, and I'm sure you've noticed how we have gradually (and unknowingly) grown apart. That doesn't mean we're gonna act like strangers; we can still get together at times, we can still stay friends.

I guess what I'm really trying to say is, I'm sorry I mess up at times, I'm sorry that the only times I have ever contacted you is for favors, I'm sorry I never called or replied to messages, and I'm sorry I'm acting like an ungrateful sprite who seems to have forgotten all the good times we had during our 5 years of schooling together.

The truth is, I do love you guys and I miss you all.